


What Games Do The Powers Play

by LLN3dseestheLight



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Firefly, Saiyuki, 幽☆遊☆白書 | YuYu Hakusho: Ghost Files
Genre: Gen, Insanity, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-10-27 04:37:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10801872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LLN3dseestheLight/pseuds/LLN3dseestheLight
Summary: Champions rise, Champions fall and other Champions become hunted.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> 'Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. This is Alchemy's first law of Equivalent Exchange. 
> 
> In those days, we really believed that to be the World's one, and only truth...'
> 
>  
> 
> Alphonse Elric- Full metal Alchemist.

The crew of Serenity looked at the would be passengers with some wariness. Kaylee had been the one to accept the passenger fee, but in light of curry events (the Tams) the Captain decided it would be best to screen any passengers before letting them aboard. Hoping it would save on the trouble later.

"So, are we in agreement," the young man with white blond hair and the very proper accent asked. He reminded them all of Simon when he first came aboard, as they watched him, watch the dark haired young man who stared at the ship in awe.

Then the dark haired one looked at the others with almost the same expression. Suddenly his expression changed to fearful as he looked behind him, " They're coming, they're coming..."he whispered.

The blond man frowned, " How long, pet?"

"Soon."

"Who's coming?" asked Mal.

"People we would like to avoid." Said the blond.

"Alliance?" asked Zoë.

"No, it's like family members you just don't want to see..."said the blond as he looked around the ship. It was a Firefly class ship. But seemed well taken care of by the crew, in other words it didn't look like it would fall out of the sky.

Mal frowned, he didn't like this...but it had been three months since their last job and things were getting tight on the ship. "Excuse us," Mal told the man, then with Zoë walked over to Wash and Inara, leaving Jayne to keep an eye on the other men. "So," he asked them.

"It's your decision, Captain." Said Zoë quietly. Wash nodded, but Mal could tell he didn't like this either.

Inara sighed, "Try not to get shot. I think Simon is getting tired of patching you up."

Mal glared at her, "I don't always get shot."

"But you do." Wash chimed in as Zoë smirked slightly.

"We need this fare." Mal muttered to them.

"Be brave, sir." Zoë said, smirking.

"Hey, you could always luck out and Jayne will be the one to get shot." Said Wash.

"One can hope," muttered Inara.

Mal glared at them then walked back to where the man waited. "We'll take you on, but we want half our payment when you board and the rest when we get to Heaven's Gate."

The man nodded, this was common practice everyone knew.

"So, it's a deal?" Asked Mal holding out his hand. The man looked at the Captain of this ship, so many things were coming into play, and there could be no mistakes. He reached out to take the Captain's hand when the Captain asked, "I'd like to know the names of the men I do business with..."

"The name's Spike."

"And him?" asked Mal motioning to the dark haired man.

"That...that's Xander." Spike as he and Mal shook hands.

***

**In an Unknown Time, In an Unknown Place.**

"Why did he steal my Champion?" asked the unknown voice.

"I don't know." Said a second voice.

"I want him back! He's mine!" this was said childishly.

"You have others..."

"He's my favorite!"

"He's insane! What use is he to the Game?"

"And whose fault is that? If you hadn't made that last play the way you did...besides it's not permanent, you know. His sanity will be returned...it always is...just not now."

"That's part of your next move isn't it?" the second voice said shocked.

"That would be telling...Still I didn't see those of Serenity getting involved." The first voice said annoyed.

"Big Damn Heroes..."muttered the second.

"Let's hope not. I'd hate to take them out of play...good Champions are hard to find."

"So what are you going to do?"

"Nothing."

"What...Why?" the second asked confused at this.

"Because it's your move..."the first said with a smirk.

***

Xander sat on one of the boxes in the cargo bay area watching, the big man move some of them around, while he glared at Xander. Why the big man was mad at him Xander didn't know.. it could have something to do with the gun he was whirling around in his hand? It was a pretty gun and well cared for, but the big man shouldn't have pointed at Xander. He never did like weapons pointed at him.

"Jayne...why does that boy have Vera?" Mal asked as he came down the stairs, followed by River. Jayne just rolled his eyes, knowing it wouldn't do any good, anything he said would just make him look stupid.

"Big men shouldn't point things at the boy..." Mal heard River whisper behind him.

Mal could see something wasn't right with the young man, but Spike had told them that the boy was harmless...but now he had to wonder. Not anyone could take a weapon away from Jayne.

"No one ever tells you that forever feels like home, sitting all alone inside your head." Xander murmured.

Mal gave him an odd look, "Where's your keeper, boy?"

"Here, there, everywhere, nowhere..."

"Well that was clear." Mal muttered. Xander nodded and scratched his head with the barrel of the gun he still held. That made Mal nervous, "Why don't you give me that?" Mal said as he slowly walked toward Xander. A strange look came over Xander's face; it was a mixture of fear and anger.

"You believed once, sliced in half you were... Don't believe now but they believe in you... Poked out an eye but I still see..."

What he was going on about Mal didn't know but, "You have two eyes so I couldn't poked it out."

Xander shook his head, " Didn't say now...but then."

Mal sighed, "Look just give me the gun and stop the crazy talk," he reached for the gun.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you, mate." A voice called down from the catwalk. Mal looked up and saw Spike smirking at him then Mal looked back at Xander who was pointing Vera at him.                            

I _'m goin' get shot_. Mal thought.

Xander smiled sweetly at Mal before he handed Mal the gun. "All you had to do was ask.".

While Mal was thinking of a reply to that River came around him and stood in front of Xander, leaning towards him until they almost touched noses, staring into his eyes. She did this for about a minute then slowly backed away with a look that could only be horror. "Gods..." she whimpered, " ...How cruel..."

Xander nodded wide-eyed, "Folded up like paper dolls and little notes..."

"Stop!" Cried River.

"You can't expect a bit of hope..."

"Still hidden in the box..." River countered.

Xander frowned and looked hard at the younger girl then said, "Who are the stars? Do they sing for you...no...only thoughts pierce your brain...how sad...no dark music for you..."

"Can't be true..." River denied.

"It's just a different scene before a final curtain call..."

"You're mixing them up!" River said, stomping her foot.

"So what?" Xander said with a shrug.

Spike watched as Xander played with the Seer of the ship, who would have thought such power still existed. But his pet was still the strongest Seer he had ever known, so powerful he could make the things he saw come true or not. But because of that power he had been hunted for it by both sides of the fight add in being immortal due Red's little dark spell after her lover was killed... "That's enough, pet." He called down from his spot on the catwalk.

"Just want her to see _it_ ..." Xander said tipping his head back so he could see Spike. "Her eyes are closed to the big picture..."

"She'll see in her own time, they all do...eventually..."muttered Spike.

"But if..."

Spike cut Xander off, " Stop, you'll only drive yourself crazy."

Xander smirked, "Thought I already was..."

***

**Unknown Time, Unknown Place**

A powerful being tossed their long black hair over their shoulder smirking at their companion.

"I still don't see the point of this..." said a young boy holding a blue pacifier in his hand.

"Your father wanted you to be more involved with humans...you are a god you know. Not just your father's paper pusher."

"I'm very happy with my job." Muttered the young boy, who was in fact thousands of years old.

Kanzeon Bosatsu, The Merciful Goddess herself...err...himself... _Their_ _self_ sighed.

Koenma had a lot to learn still it hadn't helped that his father kept the boy on a short leash. "Humans are the reason we exist...well mostly...mostly they are there to relieve our boredom."

Koenma snorted, "Maybe at one time...but the gods haven't been worshiped in centuries."

Kanzeon glared, "That's true...but a god doesn't need to be worshiped, like the old days...things happened that changed that."

"Does it have to do with that group of Champions?" Koenma asked, when it had happen he had been dealing with his own problems...a bad tempered punk, a fox demon, a forbidden child, and another punk.

"Shh, don't ever say anything about that!" Kanzeon hissed, "You will draw the wrong kind of attention."

Koenma blinked at that, he had heard stories..."What is it you want from me?" Koenma asked the Goddess.

She waved a hand over a pool of water. "Watch and learn..."

 ***

_Xander Harris crawled dripping wet of the river, he had come to the conclusion that, he really didn't like Slayers any more. This one he thought, as he cough up some water, had just about killed him. He didn't know why the Slayers he met acted in only two ways. They loved him or wanted to kill him. He lies in the mud on the bank; slow he turned over onto his back, looking up at the dark cloudy sky he muttered, "I'm too old for this shit!"_

***

" _No, Giles, this is the last one..." Xander said into the phone. "I'm done. I don't care...Let Buffy do it...What do you mean she said, no?!" He said in a shocked tone. Before he slowly hung up the phone. **Damn, I should have let her drown. Buffy is just going to get killed again.** Xander said to himself. "Now, the real question is, what do I do with you..." he said looking at the red haired Slayer tied up in the corner. She had reminded him of Willow when he first saw her. It was the same one that had tried to kill him two days ago. _

_The Slayer glared at him hatefully._

_Xander sighed._

***

_Xander dropped his bloody sword and fell to his knees from the wounds the slayer had given him; he glanced at the body of the red haired Slayer._

**_Why? Why hadn't she just stopped_ ** _? he wondered. Xander had forgiven her, had given her a second chance. And she just...Xander shook his head, he barley heard the roar of thunder, he didn't see the flash of lightening. Never felt the rain that fell. All Xander saw was the open eyes of the headless Slayer he had killed._

***

Xander's eyes snapped open quickly he looked around the room. His glaze fell on Spike who lay next to him. He heard the strange sounds of the ship that he and Spike were on. He had never liked space travel. But he thought that it was just because of the television he grew up watching.

"Go where no one has gone before...last great hope...what a crock." he muttered to himself as he sat up in the bed. He got up and got dressed, Xander then walked out of the room. He made his way to the galley and began going through the cabinets.

"What are you doing?" asked a voice from the shadows in the corner.

Xander looked over and saw the big man with the girl named after water the ship's Seer in his lap.

"Hungry."

Jayne blinked at the one word answer. "Don't your man feed you?" He asked as River sighed cuddling deeper into his arms.

"You make the mistake of thinking that I'm his," said Xander with his head in one of the cabinets.

Jayne smirked as he asked, "So, the pretty blond is free for the taking?"

Xander quickly turned to face them, "Didn't say that," he growled lowly.

"Careful, my Jayne, this Kitten has claws." River said.

"Aww, he don't look that tough. I could take him." Jayne muttered.

River gave him a look, "If you could take him then how did he get Vera earlier, hmm."

Jayne then looked away and began to mutter under his breath.

Xander returned to looking through the cabinets then pulled out some protein bars and sighed. "Why do people think this is food?" Holding one up.

Jayne snicker at the boy's expression as he looked at it." Cause it can keep you alive."

"So can grass...and it taste better." Xander said as he threw the bar down and went back to hunting in the cabinets then began to pull things out of it.

"What are you doing?"

"What does it look like? I'm going to cook anything that's not protein bars!" Xander said to Jayne.

***

An hour later the rest of the crew wandered into the galley behind them was Spike. They were following the wonderful smells. They entered the kitchen to see Jayne setting the table. "What?"

"It's just than we didn't know you were so...domestic." Said Wash with a smirk.

"Hey, the boy said I had to or I couldn't eat."

"The boy?" asked Mal, sleepily.

"Yeah, he's the one who did the cooking."

Mal blinked, " You mean to tell me, you let that moon touched boy cook?"

"Uh, yeah...I mean it's not like we let him use the sharp objects." Jayne said, confused.

"Then who did use the sharp objects?" asked Simon.

"River."

Mal shook his head and pointed his finger at Jayne saying, "Your not right in the head either, are you?"

Jayne shrugged, "Maybe not, but we're eating and none of us had to cook."

The rest of them really couldn't say anything to that.


	2. Chapter 2

Spike watched his boy wander out of the galley of the Serenity after Xander ate.

"So," Mal started, as he leaned back in his chair.

Spike sighed lighting a cigarette, "Been with the boy a long time. We've been through a lot, both together and apart..."

***

Xander walked into the cargo hold and closed the door. He looked around the room and sighed. He leaned his head against it. "The thing is...the thing is..."

***

"...The boy is a functional kind of crazy. Don't know how or why that is...he has his lucid moments..."

***

Xander heard a noise and turned to look, he saw a figure in the shadows.

***

"He's a Seer or what you would call a Reader. He's the strongest one I've ever seen and I've seen quite a few in my time. But the abilities come with a heavy price...they never stop hunting him..."

"What never stops hunting him?" asked Simon.

Spike shook his head, "Not what...who."

***

When the figure stepped into the light, Xander sunk to the floor in shock and wrapped his arm around his knees. But didn't take his eyes off the other figure, the figure of the only woman he ever asked to marry him. "He won't understand...he won't understand...we...we defeated you!"

The thing wearing his _Anya's_ body smirked at him, "Of course, he won't understand. He was never the smartest of your bunch, my Viking. I'm beyond all mortal understanding." She started to circle the room, "More than..."

***

"...the hunters want their pound of flesh from him..."

***

Xander watched in horror as the creature morphed it's shape in to the first woman he ever loved...

"...More than Blood. I'm..." The image of _Cordelia Chase_ said with a shake of her head, "You know, I don't think you humans have a word fabulous enough for me. Oh, my name...my name was once on everyone's lips..."

Xander frowned then reached out to touch the being when his hand slid through it, he smiled, "You're not real..." he singsong out.

***

" But I've learned to be patient. Things have been going well..."

***

"...Exactly where I want things to be and so are you, White Knight." Xander blinked when it turned into _Angel_ , "Have you used this speech before, cause it sounds familiar?" he asked it.

The thing glared at him but continued on, "So, what did you think? That your hero could get your sanity back for you? Bet you thought everything would be just great, uh? Sanity is like a soul. Easy to have... far easier to lose. Why, do you think I kept letting my go?" _Angel_ laughs then. "Bet you both thought, that you would be, your own men. And I respect that, really I do..."

***

"I've never understood why he stays, why he still fights..."

***

Xander looked away from it. He saw more, than felt it touch him, couldn't feel it at all.

"...You never will, pet. You've bath in the blood of a Slayer...many of them in fact. Just like me..." Xander looked into blue eyes he knew so well after all these years. It now looked like his _Spike..._ "You will always be mine, here in the dark...with me. Playing our little games. You always liked our games, right from..."

***

"...The start I knew...I knew, I couldn't leave him...right from the..."

***

"Beginning..." the creature morphed again into the creature that started Xander down his path all those years ago. He stared at the vampire vintage of _Jesse McNally_.

"Am I supposed to be impressed by this? Didn't you try this already, and lose?" Xander asked the creature, which stopped, and frown.

"Yes, but you know what they say, if you don't succeed, try, try, again."

It changed again into a shy blonde that deserved better than to be shot and killed by a stray bullet. "It's going to be a bumpy ride. You should find it interesting to say the least..."said what looked like _Tara McClay_.

Again it changed this time into his _Willow_ , " I will have my revenge. You can learn a lot in five hundred years...you humans never change...just like all those years ago, you still don't get it"

Now it turned into the oldest Slayer, Buffy Summers, on record, "It's not about what's right, not about what's wrong..."

***

"You see, it was never about that...you see..."

***

Xander jumped back and into the door, when the creature bent down to him, "It's all about power..." said _his own voice, his own face_ , " Who has it, who wants, and those..."

Xander blinked, " ...And those who are willing to take it," he finished for the dark creature..

***

"The boy has fought against destiny for so long. Destiny now has it out for him. I can only hope he can withstand the temptation. It won't be an easy thing to do."

"So, what your saying is..." said Wash amazed.

***

"You have no power." Xander told it.

"WHAT!" It screamed.

"You have no power over me. No, power over any human, that doesn't give it to you. We learn that long ago. Now, go away. I've got better things to do than to hear you babble at me." Xander said calmly to it.

"No! You can't do that! That's not playing by the rules! You are supposed to fall under my spell!"

Xander shrugged and stood up he opened the door, "Maybe if you got a new speech? Things would work out better for you? Tell you what, you get a new speech and I'll give you another chance for my soul, deal?" Xander said as he walked out of the cargo area.

The First Evil Of Mankind could only scream in denial as it disappeared, at the defeat because it had, only this one chance to return to this plain.

***

Spike watched as his boy wandered back into the galley. Spike put out his ciggerette as the boy sat down next to him. Xander looked at the faces of the crew, " What have you been telling them."

"Oh, just a little of this and that."

***

"Slayers, you killed them?"

Came the question from a dark corner of the cargo bay area. There Spike and Xander had disappeared to after breakfast. Xander sat up from the boxes of contraband chocolate, he had been lying on. Xander watched as River floated in to the light, her light slightly over-sized dress hanging off one shoulder.

"You, killed them?" she repeated her eyes taking on a blank look that Xander knew well. He wonders if his own looked like that during his own lost moments of sanity. He nodded at her question then she softly said, "Show me."

Spike sat on the catwalk stairs watching his boy and the ship's Seer and Slayer, hadn't that bit been a surprise. Spike always watched his boy around Slayers they were a danger to Xander in so many ways. They loved the boy and hated him, some at the same time. Spike heard the softly asked question and knew the boy would answer her. Spike wonder if she would like them better than when a young Slayer had asked Spike that question. Spike had told the girl what he knew, for he had been the Slayer of Slayers then...but not anymore, not for a long time. No, that title belonged to Xander now and he was more then deserving of it.

Mal and Simon had come on to the catwalk from the cockpit of the ship. They had seen River approach Xander. Neither of the two trusted the crazy young man or his keeper much. But they did respect their talents. They also knew the truth when they heard it, so when they told of the old ways, the truth of the 'Verse, of demons, vampires and old magicks. Of super powered young girls, they had no choice but to believe for their words had the ring of truth to them.

"It...was that...thing on Isis, we ran into, Mal," Simon said softly. The knowledge of the supernatural world had not sat well with him, "She's been upset since she was injured."

"Yeah, getting stabbed by your own stake," they looked down at the sarcastic voice, at Spike where he was sitting lighting a cigarette, " does that to her kind. Thought with her being a Seer herself she would have understood my boy's cryptic warning and not went hunting."

Mal sighed as her heard River ask,

"The warriors of light, you killed them. How?"

Xander smirked darkly, "We fought, I won, the end."

"That's not..."

"What you wanted to hear? I've killed dozens, upon dozens of your kind. Did you think you were special? Your not." He said with a sneer as he stood up.

"How?" repeated River in a hard voice her eyes growing cold as Xander began to circle her in a predatory manner.

"I don't like this," said Mal as he watched Xander, "something feels off."

"Gal, asked a question, now she's going to learn the answer. Whether she likes said answer or not." Spike said looking over his shoulder at them, " You will not interfere on how she learns them."

"What?" asked Simon warily.

"Some things have to be learned the hard way." Spike murmured softly as her turned back to Xander and River.

While Xander stood behind River he reached out for her suddenly and grabbed her by the back of the neck. She slammed her elbow into his stomach, he hissed in pain but didn't let go of her. Slowly he turned her so she faces him.

"Rule Number One: _Don't Die_. But you Slayers tended to forget that one so we'll move on to Rule Number Two: A Slayer must always reach for a weapon but you'll find..." Xander pulled River close to him. so close that she could feel him breathe on her face. She watched in horror as Xander's eyes began to glow a demonic green. She could feel the sharp claws of his hand at her neck and on her other arm where he held her. "That doesn't always work..."

"My god! What is he?" Whispered Simon shocked. Mal started to drawl his gun when Spike said, "You'll be dead before you can fire the first shot, besides he won't hurt her...much."

Mal and Simon exchanged a look; they didn't look too convinced at Spike's answer.

"And I have mine right here..." Xander hissed between his fangs then shoved River away from him. Shaking his head quickly, the demonic face disappeared and then his looked human again. "But I didn't always have them. I killed my first Slayer when I was human...well mostly anyway. Demons have nothing to fear but one young girl and unfortunately that _'one girl'_ is not you."

River blinked at that.

"You weren't chosen but activated." Xander said with a sad look in his eyes.

"Does it really matter? I still can..."

"Like apples from oranges, pet." Spike whispered to himself but was heard by the other two men on the catwalk.

"What do you mean?" Asked Simon.

Spike sighed, "If she was a chosen she would be touched by the Powers That Be, she's not. She doesn't have that touch of the divine about her. And demons can tell the difference. River was activated by man and will suffer for it. Her life will be even shorter that a chosen one's. Which is bloody unfair if you ask me, the activated ones are almost always the better Slayers. Bloody Wankers That Be..." He muttered the last.

"Your wrong..." River whispered. Xander gave a harsh laugh, If only...But let me tell you something...You, could kill a hundred demons, a thousand vampires, a thousand thousand of both and the minions of Hell will just keep coming. And all they would need is for one," Xander holds up one finger, "just one to have what they are all hoping for..."

"And what's that?" River asked, her sanity seemed a much clearer issue, nothing of that broken insane girl could be seen in her eyes at the moment but it was just for the moment. Xander dropped his hand then leaned close so he could whisper into her ear, "Just...one...good...day..."

River reacted, shoving him away from her and he in turn glared at her almost hatefully. Xander knew he had to make his point but it wasn't going to be easy, he had to save her from joining the ranks of the fallen and Slayers only understood one thing...

"And that means what? One good day?" asked Mal confused, he understood something important was happening below them he just wasn't sure what.

Spike shook his head in annoyance. _Save me from idiots_ , he thought."It means that sooner or later little River will came up against something she can't beat and that will be the end of her. Best she learns that now, with him."

Simon frowned, "We'll be there to stop that!"

"Yeah, Doc, you'll be there..." Spike trailed off sadly. Yes, those that loved River would be there, to watch her fall or to join her, "Let the boy teach her. She'll live longer for it...maybe, if she can accept the truth he shows her."

"You know, what your problem is," Xander asked in a darkly purring tone of voice, "you think that just cause you can kill Reavers and a few demons your now immortal. Your not, take it from someone who knows."

"Can handle myself, don't need you to tell me..."River muttered.

"Really," he said in a silky tone her learned from a certain bleach blond vampire, "explain this..." as quick as a snake Xander punched River in the wound she had in her side from where she had been stabbed with her own stake. River doubled over in pain at the sudden blow; Xander's face is blank of all emotion.

"So, that it? Lesson over now..." Rivers gasps out.

"Not even," Xander said as he eyed her coldly, "get up, we're far from done. You don't get it yet."

"We have to stop this, I won't stand here and watch him hurt her!" Exclaimed Simon as Mal nodded in agreement.

Spike growled, " Then leave but your not get past me. As distasteful as this is, it must be done or do you want to see her die?"

"Why are you so sure she wiil die?" Mal asked boldly.

Spike gave him a look, which said Mal was a moron for asking that question, "Cause I've seen hundreds no thousands of girls like her...Slayers die for one reason or another but mostly _because_ they seek it out..."

"Seek what out?" asked Simon. Spike looked over his shoulder at them in his true face, feral golden eyes glared evilly at the two men. Ridges graced his brow and fangs filled his mouth.

"Watch and learn the lesson, it's for you as much as it's for her." Spike hissed.

River slowly straightens up but cringes slightly at the pain in her side and not at the cold look in Xander's eyes. It's dark, deadly, and knowing, oh so knowing it frights her more than her visions or Xander's own insanity. Xander lashed out with a spin kick that she easily ducks then he tried to hit her but never lands a single blow. River managed to grab Xander by the throat and shoved him up against a near by wall. Xander grinned darkly at her and laughed a yippy laugh that sends shiver up her back.

"What?" she asked confused.

"Rule Number Three: _You have to ask the right questions_. You want to know why I won..."

River nods releasing him and stepped back from him,

"The question never was ' _why did I win'_ , it because I was damn good at killing them. You wonder why I did I'm sure...the reasons don't matter, not now maybe they did then but not now...No, the question you want is _'why did they lose_?'"

River stares at him blankly not understand this, Xander sighed in frustration then turned up to look at Spike on the stairs. "I can't..." he muttered.

Spike took a drawl off the cigarette then exhaled saying, "There's an old saying, pet, one you should remember, _'When the student is ready the teacher shall appear'_...do you think it was by chance we picked a ship with a Slayer on it. You know better that, that there is no such thing as chance. Teach her, Xander, she'll understand in the end."

"I wonder, " Xander said as he turned back to River who wore an angry look on her face.

River who was tired of this game and it had to be one, it was to confusing not to be, was boring her. She knew nothing could stop her she was powerful now unstoppable if she chose but she had to find out why that vampire on Isis was able to come so close too...

"TELL ME!" River screamed, as she attacked Xander with a fury of punches but this time she couldn't touch him.

"There was one, the only one Slayer whoever mattered to me...she was a beautiful, blond, blue eyed girl. She had been my hero," Xander said returning the blows and making every hit he landed count, "She was cunning and resourceful. No Slayer has ever been a match for her...but you...you come close, you fight like she did once."

 


	3. Chapter 3

**FIVE YEARS AFTER THE FALL OF THE HELLMOUTH.**

**ITALY.**

**UNKNOWN LOCATION.**

**A WAREHOUSE**.

 

_Xander in was demonic form, was thrown through an old wooden wall; he landed hard but quickly rolled to his feet. Knowing she would follow, knowing she couldn't do anything but follow..._

"She was my friend, I wanted to make that dance last forever..."

"Dance," River questions as she pants and tries to hit him again, "...You think this is a dance?"

"Dancing is all I've ever done," he said getting a far off look to his face. River used his distraction to slam into him.

Spike looks on the ensuing fight with cold golden eyes. _Now is not the time, pet. To get lost in the past_? Spike thought.

As Xander fell against the long railing of the stairs, one came loose; Xander grabbed it and yanked it from the stairs.

T _he young blond woman walked using the hole his body had made as a door. Xander stood up and growls at the woman's cold smirk. She rushed him; Xander braced himself for the first hit that landed on his jaw. He shook his head to clear it from seeing the stars and light floating in front of his eyes. They then made a show of trading blows with each other, neither gaining nor losing any ground. Learning and relearning each other's moves. But soon Xander gained the advantage, he who had spent years watching, then training Slayers to fight. And this one, well, her knew her moves almost better than she did. Not one word had been spoken between them. She did manage to back Xander up against an old glass window and backhanded him across the face. Xander's head bounced on the glass, breaking it with a shattering sound that echoed that of their friendship. Xander growled again in annoyance this time, that had hurt! Showing a set of fangs that would impress any vampire Xander then noticed the long metal rail leaning near the window he had broken, picking it up he spun it in his hands as a make shift staff,_

Xander spins the metal rail in his hands, "The thing about the dance," River slowly backs away from him, "Is that you...you never get to stop." The rail came down on her arm and she yelled in pain.

_The Slayer pulled a sliver dagger from behind her back. Xander spun the rail hitting her in the arm, making her drop the dagger and it slid across the floor, she yelled in pain._

"On and on, you will fight. Everyday, you will greet the dawn with the same question..."

Xander blinked, he knew these words or had heard them spoke before and wondered who was speaking to River or was it one of the ghosts of the past that haunted him.

_He strikes a blow suddenly to her left leg; she almost lost her balance and staggers back from him._

The ghost seems to follow him across space and time as his moves echo a long ago but never forgotten battle. He strikes her leg and hears her cry. "...Is this the day I die?"

_Xander brings the rail up and tried to hit her across the face but she caught it.They struggle for control of it. They slam into walls and pillars then Xander kicked her in the side knocking her away._

River fell against a wall, trying to catch her breath after the blow.

"It will catch you in it's grip, you won't be able to help yourself..." Xander watched and idly spun the rail in his hands."Death will follow on your heels. You are the Bringer of it to many, yet it stalks you in return and sooner or later..."

Enraged River came at him swinging but Xander caught her across the stomach knocking the breath from her.

_Xander spun the rail in his hands as he watched her catch her breath. Waiting for her next move, he didn't wait long, she lunged as him, and Xander spins around and away but hit her on the back with the rail._

"You find that, you want it, more addicting than any drug. If only to stop the fear and uncertainty, cause deep down...you love it...as much as you fear it."

River suddenly backhanded Xander across the face causing him to stumble back from her.

_He stumbles back from her then grinned a deadly grin at her and attacked again with the rail._

"Death is your art, you'll make it every night. Each kill will became more beautiful than the last..."

_Xander hits her with the rail hard enough to knock her down. She rolls over on her back to keep him in sight._

River stared up at him with wide eyes.

"...That final breath, that look of peace. All Slayers want to know. You'll be no different from them..."

_The blonde slayer kipped up to her feet; before she could gain her balance Xander knocked her in the stomach with the rail._

"In the end, it won't be the punch you didn't throw or the weapon you didn't pick up. Every single one of you...Every Slayer has...a...death...wish." Xander growled out as he hit the downed girl on the stomach, she moaned in pain.

_She looked at him with true fear in her in her blue eyes. As if she finally figured out that he wasn't playing, that they weren't just sparring, that this time it was real. That Xander was going to end it for her the way he had for her sister Slayers. Buffy smiled softly._

"I'll be there...when you fall," Xander whispered dispassionately, "When you fail...and finally succumb to the darkness..."

_Xander stared at the down at Buffy as she panted for breath. Her blue eyes looking widely up at him. Xander spun the rail before he slammed it down hard, he heard the crunching sound as her chest bone broke..._

"I guess...I'll have myself..."

_Xander could almost feel the skin and muscles tear. Almost saw the instant when the metal rail ripped apart Buffy's heart. Xander watched with dead eyes as the Slayer died with a shocked look in her own...so, sure he wouldn't be able to do it...knowing this would be her death._

_Her dance was over now._

"...A...really...good...day..."

Xander looked down at the unconscious River, the metal rail buried into the floor of the ship between her arm and torso. "Lesson over." he whispered before sinking to his knees down next to her. Slowly Xander reached out a hand and began to stroke her dark hair and watched her shallow breaths. As if to convince himself that she still lived.

Spike stubbed out the cigarette then walked down the stairs. With out looking he knew the other two men would follow. They had watched the lesson Xander had dealt the girl but he wondered if the really understood what he had tried to teach her. He doubts it. He walked up to Xander and sighed as he ran a hand through the boy's dark hair.

"Poor pet." Spike said softly as he felt Xander begin to shake under his hand.

"Why?" Simon asked as he knelt down to check on River.

"There is no why, it is what it is. Just be grateful, she still lives, the others that went up against my boy didn't," Spike said still petting Xander's hair, "He showed her and you that in the end River is still only human. That she can and will be beat, she started to chase death, seek out the hunt, if she keeps chasing...Well, there's only one way that will end. It's up to you, her brother, and you," Spike said glancing at Mal, " to protect her, save her from the darkness."

"How?"

"Show her how to live. That's she's just a girl for all her power and a young one at that. She needs to be love and protected."

"Protected?" Echoed Mal, "She can bench press a grown man..."

Spike snorted, "So, what? She's going to have problems more so cause she's not in her right mind. Love the girl, protect the girl and the rest will fall into place."

"Will it?" muttered Simon picking River up, ignoring Xander who seemed lost in his own mind if the glazed look in his mind mean anything, then walked to the Infirmary.

Spike sighed as he was Mal follow Simon, he froze when he heard the whispered word from Xander, then cursed as Xander began to repeat the whisper over and over.

_He sank down onto his knees by the dead blond Slayer. Xander slowly reached out and stroked her hair, staring at her unmoving chest as if to convince himself she was really dead. "Buffy_

_But there was no answer._

I _t was in that moment, that he felt himself slip away. All that Xander Harris was or had ever been was gone now and someone new was in his place. He understood now in that moment, what the darkness that the Slayer fought was, what their death wish was...and he well, he would give them that. There was no hope, no love, no peace for him now. Now he truly was what he had fought against for so many years, now he truly was a demon._

***

**PAST**

_Xander Harris sighed as he rubbed at his eye patch irritably and sank down into the chair in Giles office in Slayer Central. For the last three months he had been surrounded by a well meaning Willow, a sad, sulky Dawn, a worried Giles, and a silent Buffy. At least he had been until Buffy took Dawn and ran off to Italy._

_England was a depressing place; it was no wonder that so many people left it for the New World when they had the chance. All it had done was rain since he got here and to a Southern California boy, that much rain was just unnatural. But the best thing about being here was the fact that Giles was now head of the Watcher's Council. It had made sense that the Watcher with the oldest living Slayer would become the head honcho._

_Xander himself really hadn't done anything since they had come to England after the fall of SunnyDale. Mostly, he tried to forget. Forget that Anya had died, that Spike had died. Xander had even heard that Cordelia had died in L.A. and if he ever ran into Deadboy, well, that souled vampire was as good as dust. No matter what Buffy wanted. But mostly he had been spending a lot of time with a bottle of Jack Daniels. It wasn't until after Willow left for Rio that he had pulled himself out of the bottle. So, now he wondered what Giles wanted with him. Giles hadn't asked anything of him since they got here, not even to fix any of the windows that the young Slayers broke._

_Guess G-Man can pay people for that now, he thought darkly. Xander heard the door open and Giles walked in. He looked so much older now; Giles had only been in his mid-thirties when he had first come to SunnyDale. Now looked like Giles had aged twenty years in that time rather than the seven that he had been there. Xander wonder if the rest of the Scoobies looked that bad as well._

_"Xander, I'm glad you're here." Giles told him with a slight smile at the fact that the young man was sober._

_"Been here for months now, did you just now notice?"_

_"Well, without a bottle in your hand you were hard to recognize."_

_Xander frowned, had he been that bad. Apparently so. "I'm trying to cut down."._

_Giles nodded as he continued to his desk sitting in front of Xander and sat down in the chair behind it. He opened a drawer, stared at whatever was inside of it for a moment before pulling out a black leather covered journal type book. Xander eyed it curiouly before Giles laid it on the desk._

_"I need to ask you to do something for me. It will be dangerous so I want you to think hard before you give me an answer." Giles said pushing the black book across the desk to Xander._

_Xander slowly reached out but stopped short of actually touching it, "What's in it?"_

_"Names, names of newly activated Slayers."_

_"Slayers," Xander asked confused, "do you want me to find them? Like Willow and Buffy are doing?"_

_Giles slowly shook his head, "No, I want you to kill them..."_

_Xander could only blink in shock._

***

Xander sat in the bed in the quarters he shared with Spike on Serenity. He was looking at a black leather covered book in his hands. A book that had been with him for five hundred years now. Spike was leaning against a wall smoking, when he suddenly put out the cigarette.

"Xan, you've been staring at that thing for hours now. What's so interesting in there?" He asked, although he knew very well what the bloody book contained.

"A name..."

"Well, what name?" Spike asked with a frown as he walked over and sat next to him on the bed. Xander held out the book and pointed to the name.

"River Tam, Well, what a surprise, that is," Spike said mockingly, "So what are you going to do?"

Xander closed the book and put it in the dark gray leather backpack that he carried his important things in. Clothes he would leave behind, weapons too if he had to but the pack he always went back for, even if it almost got him killed and it had a few times.

***

**PAST**

"Why," Xander asked the person he thought closest to a father, "why would you ask that of me," when he found his voice.

Giles sighed heavily as he took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes tiredly. He then gave Xander an unreadable look. "Who else is there?"

Xander said nothing for a moment then asked, "What about the Council's wet work teams?"

"Most of them died when the old headquarters went down and the ones that are left, have no field experience. You know Slayers. You know how they think, how they fight..."

"I know Buffy, how she fights how she thinks..."

"You helped train those at SunnyDale."

"Giles..." Xander said standing up, with the intent to leave the office.

"Alexander, " Xander froze at that. Giles had never called him by his full...name... Ever!

"You are the only one I think can do this. In all the time I've known you, when it came down to life and death you have always done what's right. Not what's good. Did you know there was a difference? For a long time I didn't, not until Buffy died..."

"Do what's right Giles? How can you say that? I helped bring Buffy back, knowing it was wrong but I did it anyways. I summoned a singing demon, cause I wanted the fairytale ending with Anya. I blackmailed a young witch into doing a spell in order to make Cordelia fall in love with me only to have it backfire. What's right..." Xander muttered in disbelief.

"I never said you hadn't made mistakes, but I also know how right you have been in the past. You were right about not trusting Angel..."

"I just didn't like the guy."

"You saved Buffy after she faced the Master..."

"She still drowned."

"You stopped the zombies from blowing up the high school, when the rest of us were keeping the Hellmouth closed. Even after how badly we treated you that night."

Xander's mouth dropped open, "How did you find out about that?"

Giles only smirked at him, "Then you stopped Willow when no one else could..."

"That was only cause I have been her friend so long, that I knew what to say..."

"Xander, in all of those cases you could have walked away, turned a blind eye, but you didn't you did the right thing in each case." Giles told him.

"I wonder," he frowned, " It feels strange." Xander said as he looked down at the book.

"The coven in Devon preformed a spell, so that the name of the unredeemable Slayers will appear in the book in black lettering, those that still can be saved will appear in red lettering." Giles told him.

***

"Her name was in black, pet. You know what that means..."

Xander glared at Spike, "I know that, of course I of all people should know that."

Spike sighed, "So, what are you going to do?"

Xander smirked, "What I do best..."

Spike's eyes widened at that.

"...Make the black ink run red as blood...."

***

**PAST**

Isn't there anyone..."

" _No, Xander most of these girls are lost to the Slayer spirit. They have lost any ideal of who they were. They killed their families and friends and in a few cases their whole villages or towns. But some of them well, they like what they can do and use it for bad things. "_

_Xander kept staring at the book; apart of him knew Giles was right. But Xander didn't know if he could do what Giles was asking. It felt wrong, to kill the Chosen Ones who protected the world. After all he had spent seven years trying to keep a certain slayer alive._

_"If...if I do this...and I'm not saying I will..." Xander looks up and stares hard in to Giles eyes, "The others, they never know...no one ever knows."_

***

 River sat in the corner of her room as she rocked back and forth muttering over and over to herself. "He'll save me."

 

**Author's Note:**

> Not Betaed. Don't want a beta.  
> If you don't like my spelling or grammar?  
> Go read another Author's work.


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